Dealing with loss on the holidays

Well this year didn’t quite go as planned. The day started off storming.

Im talking thunder, lightning, torrential raining. The whole works. So a pool day was completely out of the picture. Little man goes to his nannies house on Tuesdays so while he played with her and her little one I went with one of my best friends and thrifted. Not before getting my Starbucks B+W Mocha though. The stormy weather and coffee in hand reminded me of fall and Ill be the first to admit I considered turning on christmas music. (Don’t hate me. Im just being honest)

So I do have to confess while I am HUGE on bargain shopping I haven’t thrifted in probably years. I am actually shocked at this considering I grew up thrifting. It use to be one of my favorite things. However it can be SO HARD for me to hold back and not buy everything. Now especially with having a little one. I usually go through a process of putting things in my cart, staring at them. Then five aisles over realizing no I don’t actually love that. Even if it is $1 or $.050.

So what I didn’t know about fourth of July was that it is a HUGE day for people who do thrift. Why? 50% off EVERYTHING. I pulled up ten mins before they opened with the parking lot pretty much empty and within 15 minutes the parking lot was half full of thrifters! I had no idea!! Does anyone else here thrift on the fourth?? Well I am SO GLAD I went!! I was able to find some super cute hoodies, and button ups for little man. That brown jacket you see in the cart I scored for $.99, a denim skirt for $2, and some jeans I am going to attempt to make into cutoff shorts. If the shorts turn out well I will do a DIY on them.

After I picked up little man we went home and just hung out at home. Because it was fourth of July I put his little outfit on simply for the sake of pictures. Cause come on you have to document this cuteness!!

While we made the most of the day and he has no idea what he ‘missed out on’ with a pool day, bbq, smores, and fireworks theres a part of my heart that genuinely grieves. See fourth of July was one of the bigger family holidays in my family. My mom loved it, we would go to the beach with my grandparents, parents, and cousins. We would explore the beaches, eat to much watermelon and stay up late watching fireworks.

With the passing of my mom and my grandparents holidays are hard. But its honestly harder when I cannot participate in them. Because when we can do holidays I feel like I am able to continue the tradition of what those who are gone left behind. So today was hard. I wanted to be able to continue the traditions that my mom and grandma loved. I wanted to be in situations that reminded me of their laughter, and jokes. The inside jokes. To be honest this was honestly probably one of the hardest holidays to date since there passing because of this.